Just one though, a fox plushie I named Reynard.
Rather than review the entire sickeningly sweet process, I'll just skip to his
"Adoption Certificate".
(You'll have to click on the image to actually read what it says.)
Miss Birdy, please don't stare at me like that.
"Hi, I'm Reynard."
Well, I kinda knew that, since I named you and all.
"I know we're going to be friends forever!"
Well, yeah. I don't plan on dying, so that seems correct enough.
"I'm proud that I'm very imagination, friendly, and bright."
Well, you seem friendly enough, and I can't really tell how much of an imagination you have, but if your grammar is any indication, then you just aren't very bright at all.
"I think collecting cards is the best!"
Er, good for you.
"My best friend is a white Polar Bear."
Huh, and I thought I was supposed to be your best friend.
"I'll let you in on a secret."
Oooooooh! Now you're talking, do tell!
"I love blueberry cheesecake and I've always wanted a Gumball Machine."
... THAT's your secret?
Why would you keep that a secret?
Well, maybe I'm being too hard on you, after all, I've secretly wanted a Foulfellow (http://disney.wikia.com/wiki/J._Worthington_Foulfellow) plush for some time.
... What?
Anyway, what bothers me is, what the flying @#$% are you going to do with a Gumball Machine?!
You don't even have hands!
(Or teeth for that matter.)
How are you going to operate one?
Oh, what, you want me to do it?
I need mine as a prop, so forget it.
Fortunately, however, Reynard has turned out to be nowhere near as dumb as his certificate implied.
(Though he is just as "cute".)
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