Irregular Bacon: FF4 NES part 2

That's right, folks! I'm still alive.

I'm going on a holiday soon, so I figured I might as well throw out another part in case the hotel doesn't have internet.

Here we are in the nest of the Ant-lion. Man, was he a pain in the rear to find!
Just for that, I'm calling him Hemorrhoid.

Anyway, at least we won't have to go through a long and tedious boss fight.
You know why? Because according to Edbert, Hemorrhoid is 100% tame.

YAY!

Unfortunately, Hemorrhoid was on vacation, and we get this ugly turd instead.
Well, let's kill it with FIRE!
What, we don't HAVE fire? Nut bunnies!

Ah well, I guess Edbert's banjo will have to do.

ONE LONG AND TEDIOUS BOSS FIGHT LATER...

Finally, he's dead.

Well, time to steal the Sand Ruby/Desert Light/Gallstone-thing-we-need-to-move-the-story forward.

Edbert is likely weirded out by the clone of himself in the bed, so let's cure her so he'll stop making that face.

And look! Rosa/Mom* is looking like herself again!

*I'm just about convinced that my mom was kidnapped and forced to play the part of Rosa in this version of the game during her trip to Bilouxi (I'm pretty sure I spelled that wrong) , after which she denied anything happened, so I might just start calling Rosa "Mom".

Remember that ice crystal from earlier?

Well, now Rydia has to melt it.
So, after a pep-talk of the century from Mom, Rydia finally decides to stop being so useless.

Instead of melting the crystal, though, she just makes it disappear.

LAME!

Suddenly, we hear a loud ACHOOOOOOO!

Guess who?

That's right, none other than Yang, who we'll call Karate Man.

Apparently, he's being attacked by a huge boulder.

Then, the boulder turns into a Lizard-man!

Dang it, why do the enemies always look cooler than the heroes? WHY?

While you're contemplating this, here's a pic of Weezy.

One boss fight later, and we arrive in town.

You know what that means, right?

"FREE ICE CREAM!!!!"

It means more portraits!

Wh-why are you looking at me like that, Bluebeard?

Good God, his eye's just about to pop right out!

Hey, Gorgeous. What're you doing here? Go be in a-

Phoenix: You've already used that line on Bulma, therefore, you'll have to come up with a new line for Gorgeous.

Drat, he caught me!

Very well, how about:

Hey Gorgeous, what's a dame like you doing in this place?

Phoenix: That's better.

And of course, Namingway is here too.

And we get another item, yay!

Time to see the local king.

Cool, but nowhere near as awesome as Baron.

After telling him about our current situation, (To which he of course responded with a loud "TRULY?!?") he takes us to guard the crystal room.